Some basic principles essential to the development and success of mediation will be ignore, denied or overrun if the ADR community does not consistently remind participants and potential participants of its values. The loudest voices critical of the values of the process are often those who see themselves as having the most to lose to an “alternative” model. In fact, they and their clients stand to gain the most if we can demonstrate how embracing the fundamentals of effective process can lead to successful outcomes.
1. Party Self-Determination. The mediation belongs to the parties, but party self-determination should not equal self destruction.
2. Flexibility is Vital. No two mediations are the same, so why do some mediators do the exact same thing every time? (Is it because the mediation is theirs not the parties?)
3. Mediation Must be Open-Ended. If no two mediations are alike, how do you know going in what to do and how can you get it done in a couple of hours?
- If you have two hours scheduled for a mediation, don’t bother.
- If the mediator and/or the parties cannot commit to a thorough pre-mediation process you may not want to bother.
4. Matching your Mediator is Key. In your first discussion with your potential mediator ask the mediator what he or she does as part of the pre-mediation process. If he or she says that they do not bother with that, thank them for their time and go back to the list of qualified mediators and start over.
5. That One Take Away. What is the pre-mediation process? The most abused, overlooked, ignored and a vital element of effective mediation. Any mediator who says that he/she doesn’t use, need or appreciate it… is a PRETENDER or at best somebody who calls himself/herself a mediator and has never bothered to take or pay attention to the class.